Thanksgiving Review

Thursday, November 27th, 2008, Blog celebrated Thanksgiving, along with probably most of the rest of America, coincidentally enough. Blog was fortunate enough to spend parts of the day with several members of the CPL: BOB’Z BOYZ, Swine Nine, Snot on the Ball and Papi’s Space Cadets all joined in the fun. Blog also happened to keep a running diary of the holiday, which you will now be subjected to because, well, it’s my blog. Now, without further ado…

6:15 – Blog wakes up this early on a holiday thanks to the 3 precious children in the other room who can’t tell time, don’t discern holidays and are allergic to sleep. We forgot to give them their midnight Benadryl doses… nuts.

7:15 – Blog gets a call from BOB’Z BOYZ confirming that there shall be golf on this beautiful, yet blustery day. Blog is pleased. Swine Nine and Snot will be joining us.

8:37 – Blog leaves his house with 3 ‘energized’ girls running circles around their mother. After all these years, Blog just can’t figure out why his wife dislikes golf so much…

8:44 – Blog is cut off in traffic by Swine and Snot. Blog looks closely and can see the new Taylor Made Burner hovering in the front seat.

9:03 – Blog pulls into RiverBend County Club and sees absolutely no other cars on the parking lot. Just to make sure that they are open for business, Snot and Blog head into the clubhouse to find that yes, they are open. Blog pays for his round, and then Snot proceeds to pay for the other 3. Blog is furious that he stepped up to the counter first.

9:06 – Blog and Snot are threatened with severe bodily harm and the forfeiture of our carts if we do not keep our carts on the cart path. ‘The Warden’ is on the prowl… and he sees all…

9:08 – Snot informs Blog of the ‘word of the day’. It is not a very Thanksgivingy word…

9:19 – Blog starts off the day with a drive down the right side of the fairway… than the rough… than a tree… but gets a nice bounce right back onto the fairway.

9:20 – Snot punishes his drive right into the 7th fairway. However, since there is NO ONE on the course, we end up just picking it up as we come down #7 a few hours later.

9:26 – Blog buries a 15 foot birdie putt, set up by a beautiful approach from Snot (as we are playing team skins). This quickly puts Blog/Snot up by 1 point and seemingly sets up Swine and BOB for a long morning.

9:38 – Blog and Snot take hole #2 as well, putting them up 2-0. The youngsters begin to feel supremely confident.

10:42 – At the 5th hole tee-box (holes 3-5 were tied), BOB begins a desperate internal struggle with his coffee and breakfast. This battle will rage until the 7th.

10:59 – Blog has officially lost all ability to hit a decent golf shot by now, and cannot get a long putt close to win 4 skins at the 6th hole. Grrrrr… The tension begins to mount as the skins pile up and it become apparent that the next team to win a hole will win the match.

11:04 – Snot follows Blog left on the 7th tee, but even in the open space, his ball cannot be found until Blog digs his 7 iron into about 18 inches of standing water to pull it out. Gotta love winter golf!

11:15 – Swine and BOB’Z each have a shot at a 5 foot putt to clinch the match. Swine misses first, than BOB’Z lips out, extending the drama. (2 5 footers?? Ouch…)

11:25 – BOB’Z internal struggle is finally resolved in the clubhouse. Onto the 8th!

11:35 – Blog puts his drive over RTE 106. ooops. Fortunately, Snot’s drive is playable from about 35 yards off the green.

11:42 – Blog somehow lucks his way into an approach that lands within 12 feet.

11:47 – Snot and Blog take the 8th hole, and the title of First Annual Turkey Golf Skins Match winners. The victory cigar is lit. Of course, Snot only brought one, so Blog gets to waft in the aroma of someone else’s symbol of their victory.

11:52 – Snot plays a pink ball on the 9th. No seriously.

12:06 – Golf is over, but Blog now finds himself in a desperate search for Ginger Snaps.

12:12 – Blog find gingerbread man cookies at Tedeschi and says good enough.

12:13-2:15 – there’s a lot of bathing, dressing, and corralling of children, and eventually, we all end up at Swine Nine’s house.

2:40 – 3:15 – there is much eating.

4:30 – Papi’s Space Cadets arrive, and the cards and chips are broken out.

5:14 (I’m guessing now) – shuffle up and deal!

5:18 – Snot is essentially done after playing 2 very bad early hands. thanks for coming!

5:22 – Cousin Emily first gives the appearance of being a serious card shark. Right up until the moment when she giggles uncontrollably once an ace is flopped. Everyone folds except Blog, who is an idiot, and loses.

7:00 – Snot has managed to make a bit of a comeback, and is now head to head vs Papi. Snot ends up all in, and is convinced that his 3 queens are good, and they are… right up until Papi shows his 3 Kings… which are better.

7:20 – Emily’s luck runs out, but the giggles will be memorable.

8:05 – Swine ends up going all in with a good hand, which he subsequently loses to Papi’s better hand. Yes… there is a theme here.

8:20 – Blog gets a set of 5’s on the turn, but instead of going all in now, he decides to wait and hope to bleed Papi a bit more. This is really stupid considering Papi will always get better cards. So of course, a 10 comes on the River, giving Papi the straight that will give him the poker crown. The winning pot is then ceded to Mrs. Papi, where is was rumored to become a purse the next day.

Happy Thanksgiving and Blog will return at some point with more baseball reviews.